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Saturday, April 01, 2006
I have lost. inspiration. motivation. zest. The adrenalin that once pumped in my veins are missing. I open another chapter. I'm going to write it my way this time. Whether you get it or not, its your fucking problem. Its my book for gods sake. Let it be written in my words. I am not allowing myself to be governed by your god damned paradigm. I have, thus far. Look where its left me. I'm still in the desert looking for my oasis. just when i think i see my water, its just a fuckin mirage. You laugh in my misery. that laughter is going to be stifled. It is not going to happen. Not anymore. you dont deserve your sadism. you dun deserve the pleasure in my sufferings. i found the perfect words but you say i'm not ready. fuck that. i'll decide when i'm ready. and i will be soon. i will eradicate your masochism. i will tear you apart piece by piece, and indulge in doing it. i need to heal, and that is my perfect carthasism. saddistic isn't it? i got it from you. You spit in my face because i'm not like the rest. i'm not as flawless. too bad you cant see that because of it, i am closer to perfection then they will ever be. My flaws allows growth. They are perfect. cool. and then what? you move on because you're bored. you live like this every day. you are stupid indeed.you wake up every morning to an energy that you do not deserve. you are a parasite. you feed off others to be happy. thats not happiness. its insecurity masked in a superficial spectrum. you do not practice what you preach. you use others to get to get to your nirvana. Satisfying indeed my friend.A dummy's guide to Learning how to get a life . that, would be highly beneficial. look in your soul, and question yourself. oh, i forgot. u dun have a soul. barbaric. and people dun see this.they look at you like you're a god. people like me see right through you. and we beg to differ. its disgusting how you've contorted our simple minds. now you know we know. now what?

 latest ramblngs at 12:01 PM